I had my first baby dream last night. It was a newborn baby boy, yet he looked like he was six months old. He was very cute (I am seriously afraid I will have an ugly kid) and he immediately started sleeping through the night. Jake and I kept fighting over who got to hold him when he cried. I woke up with a very peaceful feeling, as if maybe we aren’t completely ruining our lives. I must admit, I am still not completely thrilled about the prospect of having a baby. I sometimes wonder if we made the right decision. I know these feelings are probably normal and will probably change the minute I hear the heartbeat or see the little sea monkey on an ultrasound screen. It’s funny, I spent months trying to calm Jake down about trying for a baby, and now that it has become a reality he is constantly reassuring my insecure ass.

For the record, I have entered week 7 and I am not feeling much different. I am fighting off a cold so that might be distracting me from any prego symptoms. Still no nausea, though I still gag when I brush my tongue in the morning. My boobs don’t hurt as much, but I think I am going to need to buy new bras soon. The cups, they runneth over.

It has been a week since I had my blood work done, and as of this morning I hadn’t heard from my doctor’s office yet. I called this morning and basically said it has been a week since my blood work was completed and I am new to all of this and don’t know what to expect, so can you fill me in? The girl put me on hold for a while, then came back and said, “There were a few tests that the lab did not run, and we’re holding your blood so that it can be tested for those few things. So we can make an appointment to see the doctor again in about a month if you want.” I nearly started crying, because almost every single appointment I have ever had with the man was pointless and left me completely unsatisfied. So then the girl says, “Wait a minute, let me see if we’ve scheduled your first OB appointment yet. Oh! Yes we have. It is scheduled for March 24th at 10:00 AM.”

Jiminy Christmas. Were they ever going to call me to inform me of my appointment? But this is weight off the shoulders because, while they apparently did not test my blood for everything they were supposed to, they did test it for pregnancy because otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten the OB appointment. So yeah, in about six weeks we’ll get to hear the heartbeat and all that jazz.

I felt a tiny bit nauseous today. I gagged when I brushed my teeth, and for a few hours I felt mildly sick, almost the same feeling as eating too much food and just feeling BLECH. The feeling subsided after I ate a bit.

Prego stuff

I am feeling a little more tired than normal, but I expect that to change to "OMG I AM TOO EXHAUSTED TO GET OUT OF BED" soon. I am peeing much more often, which is annoying and I know will only get worse. I don't have any nausea and I am knocking on every piece of wood around so that I never will. My sense of smell is stronger, but I don't have any aversions yet. Well, except to cigarette smoke, but I don't think that's because I am pregnant. The only craving I have so far is for salad. I could eat salad all day long. My boobs are sore and they're already getting bigger. They're also scary looking because all the blue veins are extremely prominent right now. I enter my sixth week on Tuesday and I am half-expecting all the horrible stuff to start next week.

Oooookay?

My family doctor is a total weirdo. This is how my visit went:

Dr.: So, what can we do for you?
Me: It appears that I am pregnant!
Dr.: *chuckles* Well that’s good news! Congratulations! That’s very exciting. Did you take a test?
Me: Yes, I took two and they were both positive.
Dr.: Okay, well those store-bought tests are just as accurate as the tests we would give. You’ve probably already gone online to calculate your due date, right?
Me: Yes.
Dr.: When is it?
Me: October 7
Dr.: *writes October 7th in my file* Are you still smoking?
Me: Nope! I quit on December 1.
Dr.: Okay, well I’ll write you a referral to an OB/GYN. Do you have any preferences?
Me: Well, I am not from the area so I don’t really know of anyone.
Dr.: I’ll send you to Dr. So and So. She’s really nice. Okay, we’re all set!
Me: o.O
Dr: Oh, I do need to take your blood pressure.
Me: You may get a high reading because I was anticipating blood work! *chuckle*
Dr.: Oh no, every office is different. Are you having other symptoms? Sore breasts? Tiredness? More frequent urination?
Me: Yes.
Dr.: Certainly sounds like you’re pregnant! So don’t change anything. Live your life like normal.
Me: Okay . . . Thanks.
Dr.: Just give this referral to the girls out front. You’re all set!

So I went to the front and gave the receptionist my referral sheet, and she said, “Oh, you’re pregnant? Okay, you’re going to need blood work. The lab is still open if you want to do it now!” Sweet Jesus, WTF? So I signed in at the blood lab and since no one mentioned a pee test, I went to the bathroom. I had to pee SO BAD but I saved it because I figured I would need a pee test, and when no one mentioned it to me I said “Screw it!” and peed. So the phlebotomist was frigging awesome and she found my vein on the first try, so I had no dizziness. Then she told me she needed a urine sample and I was like, “Are you serious?? Ugh, I just went!” So I gave her a couple of drops and that was it. Lol.

So yeah, that doctor appointment was NOT what I was expecting at all. I was expecting a blood and urine test, because duh, and I was expecting my doctor to tell ME when my estimated due date was, not the other way around. I left the office totally baffled. So now I just have to wait for them to call me to tell me when my OB appointment will be.

I’m going to the doctor tomorrow for my blood test to determine if I am officially pregnant. I took another test last night because I’m paranoid. Heh. I got two lines immediately. I am not looking forward to having my blood drawn and I hope they will be as nice to me as the staff was at the lab I went to in July. I’m going to be such a big baby when it comes to getting poked and prodded. You can shove whatever you want up my hoo hoo, but if you dig around in my seemingly veinless arms I will drop to the floor.

As you can probably tell, I am not waiting three months until I tell everyone. I understand why some people do that, but I don’t feel like it’s necessary. Just because I make it out of my first trimester safely does not mean that there is not a risk of a miscarriage later on. If (Dog forbid) my early pregnancy winds up not being viable, I’ll just inform everyone and move on. Sounds harsh, but at the moment I am taking a more practical and less emotional approach to all of this.

News

Holy Mary, mother of God, what have we done? LOL. I still have to go to the doctor, but ya can't get much more positive than that when you pee on a stick. I've known for days because of the way my body was acting, but cruise ships don't stock pregnancy tests so I had to wait until I got home. My first reaction wasn't glee, oddly enough. Obviously we wanted this, and we've been trying for months, but when you see it in black and white (or pink and white, as it were) there's no telling how you'll react. Me? I am scared and shocked. I feel better today and I'm sure the excitement will come soon enough, but right now I keep thinking about how I potentially have a human being growing inside me, Aliens style. And there's only one way to expel it from my body. *shudder*